Friday, October 20, 2006

VILNIUS

YO! VILNUZ.

So we've been in Vilinus for a few days now, getting our socks rocked off and doing backflips like no utha, G. Vilnius is the capital of Lithuania, and knows how to party. Maybe. We haven't really found out yet. But we have found out a few things. Like how to say "nice boobies" in Lithuanian. Say it together now--GRA joes PA pei.

What have we discovered? Like, dude, seriously, only the BEST THING EVER:



HOLY FUCKING FRANK FUCKING ZAPPA. It figures that the only country to even make an attempt to properly honor Frank Zappa was post iron-curtain Lithuania, eager to erect (huh-huh) a statue of absolutely anything non-political. Clearly, judging from the mural, they failed. Is that Jimmy Carl Black I see? No, it isn't. Is it? No, it's a bunch of drunk Mexicans. Betcha the Lithuanian who painted that has never seen a real Mexican. Also, do you notice who isn't represented? That's right Dweezil and Ahmed, the FUCKING SELLOUTS. But I digress. FLUXUS ATTACK. Vilinus is the birthplace of Fluxus. If you don't know what I'm talking about, then FLUXUS FLUXUS. Punkass.

And coming in at slightly less important than Frank Zappa is...



Basketball.

And in a distant third...



God.

This is St. Anne's. If you say it fast enough and with a lilt of Downs Syndrome, it sounds like "Satan's". Cool.

Now what to do after a grueling day of sightseeing? Oh, that's right, get drunk. Or have one or two of the local brews and sample some of the beer snacks:



Those are pigs ears, by the way. They do booze snacks WAAAY better here than in America. Fried bread, olives, baked cheese, and pieces of pork that are extremely adventurous but not actually very good. Still, beats fucking pretzels, which suck.

FLUXUS DEFEND!

We're in Vilinus until Sunday, so we'll take some more pictures. We've just been a bit lazy lately, since we're trying to save our energy for Belarus. Oh, right, we did something else too.

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